newlywed woes

Abantu ave bethanda ukukhuluma (people just love to talk) and they will never stop this I know. Since we have let people know that we had a private wedding, the reactions we have received have been interesting. Some people were genuinely happy for us, others felt left out, others like we owe them a wedding day (we are still having one), others send lovely messages of marriage being a gift and others started dishing out the marriage advice. I love the fact that my husband and I are doing this our way and at our pace. We decided to get married a year before lobola negotiations took place, spoke to parents about moving in together just after lobola 10 months before we did, had pre-marital counselling just after lobola, had two traditional events as required and then the private wedding. We havent done anything without discussing and thinking it through. We both come from homes with both parents still married and fully present in our lives so we both have a good understanding of what a blessing and how tough a marriage can be firsthand and based on our discussions, both our parents marriages were very different.

Now back to the advice givers, I don’t mind the normal, mainstream advice on how to handle mother-in-law, how the wife is always right and handling the pressure to have children (eg.  A friends of ours swears that dishwashers are the key to a happy marriage, it’s so funny!). I also welcome aha moments discovered in marriage and positive experiences that could help me see things from a different perspective. What I don’t like is being dictated to about what kind of wife I should be, how to run my home, how to talk to my husband, who pays for what, petty nuances by people who have been married for all of less than five years, girl please! Every marriage is different because people are different and we come from different backgrounds, what you may think is the gospel won’t necessarily work for someone else. In some cases this advice does more harm than good when people try to be something they’re not. Please can we just focus on our own marriages and relationships before we go preaching  to the world on what we think is right yet back home you and your significant other barely speak or look at each other!

smith divorce rumours

The rumours that Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith are on the brink of a divorce just don’t seem to be going away and the latest is that Jada recently met with a high-profile divorce lawyer who has represented Britney Spears, Christina Aguliera Maria Shriver, Ryan Reynolds etc. which is fuelling the rumours further. This makes me so sad because the Smith’s are my favourite Hollywood couple and they have really represented success for African-Americans. I am crossing fingers that this is not the end for them, that the rumours are not true and that they manage to work out their differences and stay together :(

menlyn park drive-in

On Saturday evening we drove to Menlyn Shopping Centre in Pretoria to the drive-in, I was so excited because for as far back as I can recall this was my first drive-in experience and my husband’s too. The drive in is located on the top of the mall in parking lot P7 and they have a huge screen, a little store selling popcorn and drinks and toilets are available as well. They have two shows, a 19:30 show and a 21:30 show every day except Sundays where there’s only one show on. You pay R65 per car, it doesn’t matter how many people are in the car and you can bring your own food which means you save quite a bit of money. There were quite a few families there with children running around, so it’s very family friendly. Most people arrive at 19:30 and watch both shows or you ca arrive at 21:30 and just watch the second show. The movies change every Thursdays and you can check on the Menlyn Park website – http://www.menlynpark.co.za/drivein.htm what is showing for that particular week. We watched Johnny English Reborn starring Rowan Atkinson more famously known as Mr Bean and it was hilarious, I have included the trailer for you to watch. We really enjoyed the experience and it was well worth the 40km drive.